Two dozen uses for dryer sheets?

Okay, so I'm too lazy to forward this but it did amuse me. It's an email from my Mom's best friend, who is notorious for forwarding small-minded political and fundamentalist Christian email messages to me (she couldn't be more different from my mom ideologically---how did they get to be friends?). Thanks, but no thanks. This was a pleasant break from the usual:

My mail carrier told me that the US Postal service sent out a message to all letter carriers to put a sheet of Bounce in their uniform pockets to keep yellow-jackets away. All this time you've just been putting Bounce in the dryer! It will chase ants away when you lay a sheet near them. It also repels mice. Spread sheets around foundation areas, or in trailers, or cars that are sitting and it keeps mice from entering your vehicle. It takes the odor out of books and photo albums that don't get opened too often. It repels mosquitoes. Tie a sheet of Bounce through a belt loop when outdoors during mosquito season. Eliminate static electricity from your television (or computer) screen. Since Bounce is designed to help eliminate static cling, wipe your television screen with a used sheet of Bounce to keep dust from resettling. Dissolve soap scum from shower doors. Clean with a sheet of Bounce. To freshen the air in your home, place an individual sheet of Bounce in a drawer or hang in the closet. Put Bounce sheet in vacuum cleaner. Prevent thread from tangling. Run a threaded needle through a sheet of Bounce before beginning to sew. Prevent musty suitcases. Place an individual sheet of Bounce inside empty luggage before storing. To freshen the air in your car - Place a sheet of Bounce under the front seat. Clean baked-on foods from a cooking pan. Put a sheet in a pan, fill with water, let sit overnight, and sponge clean. The anti-static agent apparently weakens the bond between the food and the pan. Eliminate odors in wastebaskets. Place a sheet of Bounce at the bottom of the wastebasket. Collect cat hair. Rubbing the area with a sheet of Bounce will magnetically attract all the loose hairs. Eliminate static electricity from Venetian blinds. Wipe the blinds with a sheet of Bounce to prevent dust from resettling. Wipe up sawdust from drilling or sand papering. A used sheet of Bounce will collect sawdust like a tack cloth. Eliminate odors in dirty laundry. Place an individual sheet of Bounce at the bottom of a laundry bag or hamper. Deodorize shoes or sneakers. Place a sheet of Bounce in your shoes or sneakers overnight. Golfers put a Bounce sheet in their back pocket to keep the bees away. Put a Bounce sheet in your sleeping bag and tent before folding and storing them. It will keep them smelling fresh. Quick, "Bounce" this on within the next 5 minutes! Nothing will happen if you don't, but your friends will be glad to hear these hints!

Here it is on Snopes. It is interesting to note that the entire message references Bounce dryer sheets as if they were the only ones with these mystical properties. It may be a conspiracy---perhaps the parent company is a right-wing fundamentalist Christian-owned one.